Painful Heartbeats
by Magnus Glitter Bane Alec
Summary: Every heartbeat hurts. Every one of them hurts as Alec keeps remembering the things he would rather forget. He needs someone to make it better. And maybe he knows just the right person. But will it really help? This is an AU. No connection to the original plot. But I hope you read it and like it.


_Ok this is an AU oneshot. And I have no idea where this came from. But since I got an idea I had to write it so here you go. Hope you like it._

My heart was beating painfully in my chest.

Every heartbeat making me remember. One by one, flashbacks I wanted to forget just kept coming as I sat on the bench in the park and shivered from the cold. My too thin jacket not made for the late night winds that were blowing right now.

Tears stung in my eyes as I continued remembering everything I wanted to forget. My heart beating painfully with every one of them.

One.

_The bag hit me in the stomach hard making me almost fall over but I stayed upright. Not wanting to give him that satisfaction._

"_You. You are not my son." He spit at me, eyes glaring. "No son of mine is a sick fag." He said and I flinched. His words hurting me but me still staying put. Glaring at him as much as he was at me. There is no way I'm letting him win. No way am I letting him see me break. I thought as I fisted the bag in my hands. "Don't you even dare coming back. Or come close to your sister and brother. I don't want your sickness on them."_

"_I am not sick." I said through my teeth. My jaw hurting when I did. The punch I got from him a few minutes ago starting to hurt._

_He laughed without humor. "You don't deserve to bare a Lightwood name. Now get lost. I don't want to see you ever again."_

_And with that he slammed the door in my face._

_Leaving me with a small bag and only the clothes on my back, fighting back the hurtful tears that were threatening to spill out. Leaving me with a painful heart as his words echoed in my head again and again and again until the tears started. _

_Why? Why did this have to happen? I thought as I crumbled against a wall in an alley. I don't want this! I don't want it!_

I hugged my knees to my chest as I continued shivering. Tears falling freely now as I looked up at the night sky. Every new heartbeat hurting more and more as I continued remembering.

Two

"_Move." I heard a male voice before I was pushed into the lockers and laughter was heard as they walked past me. Throwing insults at me as they did and some of them pushing me into the lockers even more._

_My back hurt but I was used to it by now so I only straightened back up and continued towards my own locker. Trying to ignore the pain that wasn't just physical. Trying to ignore all the side comments, insults and disgusted glares I got from everyone I passed._

_It was even worse now then usual. My dad kicking me out still too fresh in my mind. Making everything hurt even more._

_The second I caught sight of my locker I stopped frozen. My heartbeat pulsing loudly in my ears as people whispered around me. Pointing sometimes but most of them just laughing._

_There was a word written on my locker in big red letters. The same word that dad called me yesterday when he kicked me out. The same word I hear every day in school more than a few times._

_Seeing Fag written on my locker was it. That was my breaking point as I turned around and hurried back the way I came. Trying to ignore everyone around me as I practically ran out of the school. _

_It was heard to breathe. Everything hurt and it was just too hard to breathe._

_I few minutes later I found myself in the same park and on the same bench I slept on yesterday. Because I had nowhere else to go. I don't have anything anymore._

_And as I felt tears start falling again I decided that I'm not going back there again. I'm not going back to that school. It's too painful. I can't take the disgusted glares every day anymore. The pushes and the insults. I can't take it anymore. I'm just sick of it. I can't._

My hands were fisted now. I didn't want to remember. I wanted to forget. I didn't want to remember.

"Alec…" A hand on my shoulder made me suddenly flinch and snap out of my thoughts. Looking up at who it is with blurry eyes. Seeing the one person I needed to see right now. The only person I wanted to see.

"Alec I have been calling out to you for the past…" He trailed off and furrowed his eyebrows as he noticed my tear streaked face and red eyes. "Hey. Hey what happened?" He looked concerned now as he sat down next to me and pulled me into his embrace. Making me let out a sob as he did and his arms only tightened around me.

"They…They kicked me out." I said shakily, trying to will the tears away but failing.

He pulled away for a minute to look at me with wide unbelieving eyes that turned into angry and confused ones as he looked me over again. "Why? Alec what happened?"

I leaned forward, needing his warmth. Needing Magnus's arms around me again to what he complied without any hesitation. Pulling me so close that I ended up practically sitting on his lap. But I needed the contact. I needed him to say that it's going to be ok. I just needed him.

I took another shaky breath as my heartbeat echoed loudly in my head. Making it hard to think but I tried explaining anyway. "They found out about me. About you. They found out in school and kicked me out." I couldn't stop fresh tears from pouring as I talked. It was the first time I said it out loud and it hurt. It hurt like hell. But still I continued. "And…And I quit school. I can't go back there again. I can't take it anymore. I can't-" I felt choked and he tightened his hold on me. Passing a hand through my hair to try and calm me down.

"I'm sorry love. I'm sorry you're going through this. Why didn't you call me sooner? "

"I…I didn't want to bother you." I said after a few seconds and he pulled away again but this time so he can plant a kiss on my lips.

"You could never do that. " He said softly after the kiss. "I love you and you can never ever be a bother. Especially not when it's about this."

I felt myself start to calm down a little at his words. My heart stopping to hurt so much as Magnus soothed out my pain. As he reminded me with that small kiss how much I love him. Why I can and will get through this.

Because he will be there for me. He was always there for me.

"I love you too." I whispered, tears finally starting to slow down for the first time in the past two days.

"Now come here darling. You're freezing." He said, standing up and pulling me with him.

I looked at him confused as he started walking, pulling me with him. "Magnus, you live in a dorm. I can't come with you."

"Yes you can." He said determinedly, sending a small smile my way. "Don't worry. Everything will be ok. It's only going to be a temporary fix. I have some money saved so we can go find an apartment when you feel better."

"You don't have to-" I tried arguing but he cut me off with a kiss. Making me feel safe in his arms as I kissed back and our lips moved in sync.

"Stop worrying." He whispered, his forehead on mine. "I'm here for you. I'm going to make sure everything is ok. So stop worrying. Just let me take care of you one more time." He said making me remember how we met. Making me remember all the things he did for me. Some of them that he didn't even notice he did but still meant a lot and I found myself relaxing. I found myself letting go and giving in. Because Magnus seems to always be there when I need him the most. He's always there to take care of me.

I gave him a small smile. "I love you." Was the only thing that came out of my mouth before I kissed him.

Loving how safe I feel with him. Loving how carefree and happy he makes me feel. The way he kisses back immediately and pulled me as close to him as possible.

And I knew it will get better.

The pain will get better because Magnus is here.

Magnus is going to make it better.

Magnus always makes it better.

_Did you like it? Tell me what you think._

_Yeah like I said I have no idea where this came from. It's only a aneshot this time. But maybe I make another separated oneshot that will show how they met. I don't know… Maybe if you liked this. So you know please review and tell me what you think. I would really like to hear it._


End file.
